I haven’t been able to figure out why I haven’t been hating myself as forcefully and as frequently as usual. This actually worried me for a variety of reasons, but that’s a post for another day. Anyway, I ran out of weed two days ago, completely out. And immediately, my mood dropped, the self-hatred and belittling began. I made myself sick, er well more sick. I barely slept. My temper took over. Now I have my drugs and I feel simply grand. I actually ate something. Not something healthy, but I ate it anyway. The kid working the drive-thru window actually smirked when he handed me my fries. I mean, my friends and I all got together to paint our pumpkins, naturally weed was involved. I cracked up of course. Afterwards, I needed food. So off to the drive-thru I go, stoned out of my mind, red swollen eyes…the whole scene. But now I’ve had my snacks and got the tunes on. I feel better. I think the drugs work better than any anti-depressant I have tried from the psychologist.