In the long line of terrible things in my life, comes the newest nightmare. About a week ago, I invited someone to my home for some fun. While I was getting high, I noticed that this person was not, despite appearing to smoke. At some point in the evening, the entire world went numb and hazy. I was there, mostly aware of my surroundings but unable to resist in any way. I recall being extremely sleepy, to the point that I was awake but my eyes were closed. I couldn’t keep them open. I was extremely lethargic and felt incredibly drunk. Except I had not had a single drink. Bits and pieces flash into my memory. I recall time passing but I was unaware of how much had passed. I was dizzy, so dizzy that sitting up made the room spin violently. Some time later I became very nauseated and had to fight the urge to throw up for several hours. Following this, I slept for about 10 solid hours.
I remember some of what happened during this time, but the missing parts scare me. I know I had sex. I also know that I invited the person over for that purpose. I have no evidence that anything illegal took place. I don’t even know if I was drugged. What I do know is that I have been unable to recreate this feeling using only pot. So was I drugged? I don’t know. I’ll never know for certain bc I dumped every open bottle in my kitchen and spent half an hour showering.
What I do know is that every time I pull up to my home, I pray to God that he isn’t sitting in the parking lot waiting. Every time I open the door to leave, I worry that he will be on the other side. Every sound I hear at night is him coming back.
Am I making a huge deal out of nothing, probably.
If any of this sounds familiar to anyone, please send me a message.